The Ben Murphy

Extract from Encyclopedia Johntannica

Ben Murphy:
Mammal.
Prone to acute laziness.
Diet consists mainly of ice cream topping eaten in pure form, and chips and gravy.
Sleeping patterns are nocturnal, species is known to have sleep enzyme concentrations raised when in the proximity of one lecturing on the topic of mathematics.
When exposed to stituations of stress, the Ben Murphy's fight or flight response is manifested in the form of loud complaining which scares away its enemies.
The Ben Murphy prefers to sleep stranded accross multiple platforms such as chairs rather than upon continuous flat surfaces.
The Ben Murphy is known to procrastinate even in simple tasks such as breathing, often waiting for very long periods between inhalation and exhalation. For this reason the ben murphy is prone to consistent losses of consciousness.
The Ben Murphy is attracted to the artificial light created by cathode ray tubes.
The Ben Murphy's typical habitats are chairs, the ground, buses, and beds.
In all situations the ben murphy is in its natural state when sitting or lying down.
This completes the entry on the Ben Murphy.